What Is It?

It seems to be the new trendy saying - It is what it is. As if that explains it all away. Gives us some answers. Provides meaning. Yet I ask - what the Fuck is it? I have thrown out the "It is what it is" to girlfriends trying to understand their man's actions, a colleague wondering why the boss did what they did, or to myself questioning how close my dress size is truly going to get to my age. Honestly, we say it when we can find no meaning - when it's clear life smacked us upside the head and we have no clue what to do or say. It sounds cool and aloof but hides major anxiety.



I think the new saying should be "It is what it is - whatever the fuck it is." Emphasis on fuck.



At least then we're being honest.



So what the F is it? What does it all mean? I guess really, it's not a What question by a Why? Why am I here? Why do I spend more on self-help books than on toilet paper? Why do men like football? Why does my ass get bigger in direct proportion to how much data I have about how to keep it small? How come Bret Favre is such a big deal this weekend when honestly, all of Wisconsin should hate his guts -- like a woman whose husband leaves her then takes up with the hottest babe in town and moves into a bigger, better house? Oh, and has a smaller butt and bigger bust. And how is it old football players can retire and come back - oh, and retire and come back again - no matter how old they get -- and women seem to believe that at 40, we're of no value anymore?



Let's create a Hall of Fame for the women out there who keep striving, who throw as many interceptions as touchdowns, who fail yet succeed just like a Favre, all in one day? Who keep going back out on the playing field of life to find more, earn more, succeed more, make one more Hail Mary pass that lands us a win. No one cheers for us, but we keep throwing.



It is what it is. Seriously. Whatever the fuck it is.



So why do I need to find meaning? Why must I feel there is something bigger, better, more meaningful out there for me? And oh, god, why do I feel like I want to find a man to be on that journey with me? We all know that just complicates things ...



So I ask why. And WTF. And where are the answers. And who has them. And when I get them, will I even care anymore or will I be too friggin exhausted by this life to do anything with them? Because whatever it is, it is ... and yet, I have an amazing, wacked-out faith that those answers are exactly what I need. And I can't wait to fucking find them. Emphasis on the fuck.